Tipsy Tutorial Tuesday

Today, we will focus on the fine art of bribery.  Many children's psychology experts will tell you that bribery is a horrible way to teach a child correct principles.  I disagree...vehemently.  Bribery is positive reinforcement, if done correctly and applied intermittently so that it is never expected but always appreciated.   Bribery is such a beautiful thing, in the right place, at the right time, with the right person/people.

Step 1-Here we have a boy who desperately wants to play with his brother's Christmas toys while said brother is away at school.  I have so many things to do and he is so sweetly persistent (very, very persistent) that I give in.  Surely he will clean them up or I will help him clean them up when I am done working.  I fall for this scenario or a similar 1 every afternoon, just so you know.

Step 2-The easy part where the boy plays happily for a couple of hours while I get much accomplished.  We are both feeling productive and satisfied at this point, thus how I let this happen every day.  But then...

Step 3-Darkness ensues as more and more toys are added to the mess, and by the time I am done working and see the disaster area, it is time to go get the other kids.  Timing is everything with bribery, so I make sure they are fresh home from school, nice and starving for some food, maybe a little cranky.  Then I say, "Children, I will give you candy if you pick up your little brother's mess."  Luckily, at least this time, they readily agreed.

Step 4-The Hulk (TH) must be temporarily corralled as he is a firm practicing member of the I Only Make Messes, I Don't Clean Them Up Sweetheart Religion.  He is also bribed with candy to keep the screaming at bay during the process.

Step 5-The Dog always tries to help.  He probably thinks food is involved too.  Silly, silly puppy.  It is a good idea not to contain the dog at this point anyway as he will clean up any chunks of candy that fall from the baby's high chair or the eager wee ones' mouths.

Step 6-Here they are with their candy (probably mostly consumed with those voracious appetites).  Bribery only works if you follow through.  Otherwise, you are known as a filthy liar instead of an effective parent, and rumors spread fast around these parts.  Deliver the goods stat and all is well.  The children are satisfied.  You are satisfied.  The house is clean for The Husband's arrival.  Repeat intermittently as deemed necessary.  Easy enough!