Despite probably the weirdest student teaching semester thanks to COVID-19, I made it through and my diploma is supposed to be ordered next week, and I can apply for certification once my official transcript is here too. I was/am so happy to be done. I am substituting for the spring. I need to get Lucas to help me with my resume. I have a long-term sub job March through June (67 days!) which will kind of be like student teaching minus a full-time mentor teacher. And I am trying to wrap my mind around getting prepared for interviews and then doing them, without fainting or freaking out. I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing, but I need to give off some kind of 'she knows what she's doing' vibe when I interview. Sigh. Scary stuff, but Heavenly Father has gotten me through one thing and over another hurdle and through several storms, so I know He will help me get through this. Below is a picture of me my last day of the semester, subbing as a librarian and dressed as an elf.
The last 9 months-what can I say? A billion memes have been made. We hand a pandemic, protests and riots related to racial injustices, an IMO horrible President making his last year the worst, a very strange election and then right wing extremists storming our nation's capitol, egged on by the sore loser, Donald Trump, who is supposed to be protecting our country, not endangering it. And have I been able to go to the temple during all of this? No! Only for rare exceptions and new ordinances have people been going to temples. How much we took for granted before this time. I'm out of practice for normal church, normal school, normal anything, really.
My brain is a little dead right now, not going to lie, as I think after 9 months of no diseases, I am getting a cold. But I did a really really hard thing. Lucas helped me do that really really hard thing. Even though now I spend more time away from home during wake hours than at home (except for weekends, school breaks and summer), this adventure (haha, um, idk if I'd call it an adventure) has reinforced without a doubt that my family is what I love more than anything else. They are my reason and my motivation. I can't wait to see them every morning and every evening and every weekend. I don't know why, but Heavenly Father let my husband and children part of life come so easily to me. Now the keeping it all together and taking good care of everyone and never giving up and having confidence in myself and figuring out what I wanted and needed to do-that wasn't easy. Life has most definitely been hard, but as Lucas said in one of our home sacrament meetings recently, LIFE WAS NOT BUILT FOR COMFORT. It's taken me a long time to realize that, but I think I'm starting to get it now. And last September I turned 40. Can you believe it? In some ways I can and in some ways I think no way.
I am so thankful for my family, my husband, my Father in Heaven, my Savior, a living prophet, Christ's church restored through Joseph Smith, the Book of Mormon, temples, and all of God's amazing creations and the ways He has inspired man.
Wish me luck subbing and becoming a real employed teacher. We have big financial goals, but it means I need to sub until I'm hired and then work hard after that. I want to be a great teacher. I want my students to enjoy my class. My internship, subbing and student teaching make me feel like it is going to be a huge challenge because that's not how real life in the field schools work for the most part. I also want to keep my contract hours, working very hard, and then not bring a bunch of work home and feel guilty about not working constantly. Another huge challenge, but I feel like Heavenly Father will support me in this because family first. It may take a few messy years to get it all working, but I know what my goals are in a broad sense. Here I come, teaching!!!
