So, however many days later, Daph decided to roll from tummy to back. I know, I know, it's not a big deal, but having a little experience with this child thing and them growing so fast, I know I will care and I will want to remember these little things.
"Look Ma, I just rolled over!" Shocked but proud.
It all started with my trying to get the kitchen clean, with her lying on the floor next to me. The girl - she has lungs. Like from this little body come screams of happiness/communication that are louder than anyone else in the whole house. Her screams echo off the walls. Maybe she enjoys the acoustics? So I thought, Hey, she must be bored. Let's give her a challenge. I thus put her on her belly. She practiced holding her head up high for awhile, and then started talking to me, like this isn't fun anymore. I'm done now. Roll me over. When I waited long enough that she rolled herself over with a few calls of her name from mommy behind her. She rolled over so she could see me and get more comfortable. And she was so happy. I was proud.
Here is my pedi after being w/o polish for months and months and months. My poor little (not so little) feet. They are not supermodel feet (ha), but they serve me well and have stories to tell. The REAL reason I had to share this pic is that I'm pretty sure it's the first pedi photo bomb. Check out that sweet little nearly 3-year-old toe peaking in at the bottom. He was determined to be a part of this. Hehe, I just realized he also toe photobombed the above pic. Rock on, my little Shawn, rock on.
Had a great day today. When I was just minding my business this morning and driving Matt across town to soccer camp, I decided to do a little memory lane action since we were in the neighborhood. Looking at our pre kid hangouts and where we lived and just thinking about it all, I had the greatest epiphany/feelings/insights/view of my life from afar. It was from the Holy Ghost for sure. It was just this amazing reminder from God. I get so bogged down (SO.BOGGED.DOWN) in the day-to-day must dos and getting these kids taken care of and trying to take care of this house and trying to make finances work out just so, reminding myself constantly of what I'm NOT doing right and need to do better, that I hadn't realized/had forgotten how far I've come, how much I've done, how much Lucas and I have built. I get so focused on if I am doing right by my kids and my responsibilities that I fail to see all I've become. I feel so frustrated that we don't have more money that I forget how much we've progressed in that field. And maybe some of it is comparison or thinking how I thought it would be versus how it is. Regardless, this morning my loving Heavenly Father said things aren't perfect. Things are so far from what you thought was possible or where you imagined you would be, BUT that is so okay. In some ways, you have way more than you could have ever imagined. All your needs are met. You are so blessed. And you have grown. Oh look at how you have grown. Nope, not rich. Nope, not perfect. Nope, not able to control pretty much anything around you, but you are that much closer to being who I want you to be. You have done a lot more than you realize and you will keep doing a lot, and all the hard work is worth it every time, even though at the time you may feel it's pointless. You are growing, even as you do the mundane and the hard and the beautiful and the thankless things you do, and that is all that matters.
I do have so much more I need to do to be who I need to be, but it was great to have some peaceful (tad emotional) moments this morning in a park near where my family started, as I watched my kids play, to remind me that I am where I need to be, I matter, and I have progressed/grown up/learned so very, very much without even realizing it. I needed that. Thank you Lord!
Oh, and just to be clear, I fully realize that my growth has come from trying (though I can be a big failure at it more often than not) to keep the promises I've made with my Father in Heaven. It is because of the Savior's Atonement that I've made it this far, and it is because of Him that I will press forward each and every day, the greatest of them and the most drudge-filled ones (read vomit duty and bad attitude rather than gratitude in my compatriots).
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